Is there something that you really, really want, but you are hesitant to get it for yourself because it is expensive/the time is not right/you don’t deserve it etc.?
And sometimes you don’t understand the motivation behind your hesitation, or – even worse – you try and manipulate the Universe into giving you what you want, because someone told you that if you wish hard enough, your wishes will come true.
I can recall two instances where I was in such a position.
The first one was when my old wrist watch finally gave in. I was able to use a mobile phone instead to tell the time, but I really wanted a beautiful new watch – and because I was alone and lonely, I asked the Universe to send to me a beautiful man who will buy me the perfect wrist watch.
Nothing happened. I did not meet the man, and I still did not have a wrist watch.
I then went on holiday to the Principality of Lichtenstein, and saw the perfect watch – gold, the right size, the right shape, the most beautiful design – and I bought it for myself. I am still wearing the watch, and it still bring me joy.
Meanwhile the man finally arrived, and did not notice my watch. For my birthday he bought me a watch – a silver monstrosity with pink rhinestones. The relationship did not last, and not even the charity shop wanted the silver watch – it was that ugly. No, he did not try to make fun of me. He just had really bad taste and did not know my taste at all or even bother to find out.
To this day I am glad that when I had the opportunity, I bought myself the beautiful wrist watch rather than try to interfere with the plan that the Universe had with me.
The other instance was my visit to Venice.
For years, I wanted to visit Venice. I thought it would be wonderful if I could go there with a good friend or – if you can believe the publicity – a lover. I have travelled extensively in Europe – mostly on my own – but for some reason I had this mental block about travelling to Venice alone.
When I realised that my time living in Europe was up, I decided to bite the bullet and go to Venice for a short break. My intention was to stay in a hotel in Marghera, a village nearby, and from there take a bus to Venice. I would then spend the rest of the time doing other touristy things around Venice, but at least I can place a tick mark next to Venice on my to-do list.
Buy – was I wrong! I arrived in Marghera, took the bus to Venice, and explored the city. I did the same the next day – and the next, and the next – and if I can go back today I will. The whole place just took my breath away. I spent hours on the water buses. I walked through every alley and shared an over-priced gondola with an American family. I browsed in the shops. I just took in the incredible beauty and tranquillity of the place, day after day, and enjoyed the gelato.
Yes, it was summer and the place was teeming with tourists, but even so, I experienced a tranquillity that remains with me to this day. The only experience that impacted on my tranquillity was my visit to the beautiful San Marco cathedral. It is a stunning place – much more beautiful than the photographs suggest. I did not mind paying an entrance fee, because such places need to be maintained, and I understand that building maintenance is expensive. What I did mind was having to spend money on a dull brown, papery, plastic piece of simulated cloth that I was expected to use to cover my shoulders before I could enter the cathedral. To this day I am convinced that God firstly created my shoulders – and did a good job even if I may say so myself – and secondly God would not have been offended by my short sleeves – not even bare shoulders - and that God also dislikes that piece of … At least I can count my blessings, because another tourist was required to buy two pieces – one to cover his bare arms, and another one to cover his legs, because apparently the God of that cathedral also has issues with bare male legs.
Both these incidents taught me that if a thought resonates with you, then you need to trust and do what you need to do so that you can have the experience. In both instances they were not just short-lived experiences – they were moments that are with me to this day, and I felt a depth and a sense of satisfaction in those moments that gave me a glimpse of eternity.
I have since them recognised the same urge when I think of New Zealand and Peru, and I will go there – on my own or with other people – it does not matter. I don’t have the money yet, but I know by now that as the thought materialises, the funding comes with the reality.
These callings do not necessarily relate to travel or to leaving your country. I felt the same when I first had the thought of designing on-line courses (I already have two, and working on a third one and have a list of ideas that are germinating). Right now I feel the same about my future vision of having a house overlooking the ocean – and it will happen, soon.
What do you need to do right now to make your dreams reality? Go ahead – do it …