Who is in charge of your memories?

I was clearing out some photographs over the weekend and had to decide whether to keep or delete photographs of people who are no longer part of my life. I decided to keep the photographs because each one of those people made me the person I am today, and I want to take my gratitude for them into the future. I have no desire to destroy them or their images. And this is not emotional baggage either. If I lose the photographs because of my own doing, I will not be devastated.

This reminded me of my first serious adult relationship – a really sweet one that was not meant to last. Even at the time I knew that I was out of my depth and I think that contributed to me feeling flattered about the attention I was receiving at the time. When the relationship fizzled out, I felt gratitude and relief and moved on – and kept the photographs and mementos.

Then I had another relationship where my new partner insisted on destroying all those innocent love letters and photographs. At the time I thought I should feel flattered because of his jealousy and possessiveness, but I just felt bewildered and a sense of loss.

That sense of loss has remained with me until this day. It is not a matter of getting closure or letting go of the previous relationship – that was never relevant.

Not all memories of a past relationship are “bad” – or “good” for that matter. Those memories are part of a path of self-discovery and very personal.

When you hand your memories to another person, no matter what your motivation is, it is in fact the beginning of the end for the new relationship. This is the point where you hand over control of your destiny to your new partner, and where you put a part of yourself on hold. That part of yourself does not go away – it waits until you are ready to deal with it.

I spent the rest of the weekend recalling my rose-coloured version of that first relationship – and maybe it was good that there were no photographs or love letters to remind me of the reality – who knows?

I only realized yesterday what I was meant to learn from an incident that happened a lifetime ago – because I am now ready to learn and move on.

Have you smiled today? Have you given someone else a reason to smile?

Watch this short video and have a lovely day.

Love and Light
Elsabe
PS: I am The Intuition Coach. I help people who lack clarity, vision and purpose to remove their blocks, discover their intuition and achieve their goals. What is consuming all your energy? Visit www.TheIntuitionCoach.com for a FREE New Start Quiz.

I like to believe that there is good in every person, and all we need to do is keep looking and keep loving.

I am also realistic because life has taught me that this approach only works up to a point. Some people are on this earth to spread poison and malice, and with the best will in the world you cannot change them, because their mission is not to change.

There have been times in my life when I was so bombarded with negative energy that I felt I was being dragged down into the same space as the people who projected their lack of self-love on me. I have had to make some very hard decisions about people that were supposed to be close to me, but who were clearly out to destroy me. I had to distance myself from those people and it was very painful but necessary for my own survival.

The consequence was that by detaching myself from the person and the situation, I discovered what those people had to teach me. I was then able to appreciate the wisdom I gained from them and think of them with unconditional love – or so I thought. The love was there, but on the condition that despite my gratitude towards them, I had to stay away from them if I wanted to be my true self.

I discovered that as people we are not capable of unconditional love, but we are capable of forgiveness – in the sense that forgiveness means understanding what those people have had to teach us, and feeling gratitude for the wisdom we gained from our experience.

Social media is no different from life – in fact, social media contacts are probably even more intense and instructive than having personal contact with people.

When we have personal contact with people, we can lie and pretend, and get away with it for a while. With social media, every word and sentence you type carries its own energy, and people pick that energy up, even if they deny that such energy exists.

I have blocked contact with a handful of people of the type of “hi mem I want to merry nice amerikin girl mem do you life alone mem”. I have blocked contact with one other person who was incredibly destructive and who on more than one occasion had a field day while intoxicated, only to brag about the situation afterwards.

I do believe in freedom of speech, and I also believe that bad energy rubs off. There are times when you have to decide to either love and leave a contact, or be dragged down to the level where that contact feels comfortable. This is no different from life away from the internet, just more intense and therefore happening much faster.

If you ever decide to block a social media contact, I trust that you will do it with love and understanding rather than with anger and resentment.

Do you realize what a work of art your human body is?

Reflexologists can diagnose and pinpoint the stress in your body by pressing on various parts of your feet and hands.

Homeopaths can diagnose dis-ease in the body by looking into your eye.

The ancient Chinese diagnosed dis-ease by feeling your ear.

Even today people give up smoking by means of acupuncture treatment on the ear.

Your entire body is represented in every other part of your body.

Isn’t that a miracle?

Here is a little exercise for you.

Quickly write down three things you believe about yourself on a piece of paper. Put the paper in your pocket.

Now ask a few people that you have regular contact with to write down three things about you on separate pieces of paper.

Compare the notes.

Who said the positive things about you?

Who said the negative things about you?

Oh, and remember to express gratitude for what you feel when you read the notes.

Love and Light
Elsabe
PS: I am The Intuition Coach. I help people who lack clarity, vision and purpose to remove their blocks, discover their intuition and achieve their goals. What is consuming all your energy? Visit www.TheIntuitionCoach.com for a FREE New Start Quiz.

Do you realise that nothing on this earth exists unless someone has first imagined it?

What are you imagining for yourself?

Do you allow yourself to imagine in details, because you understand that imagination is the beginning of creation? Or do you only imagine a vague picture because you do not trust the process?

Do you allow yourself to dream big, or do you stay on safe grounds and dream small with no real challenge?

Love and Light
Elsabe
PS: I am The Intuition Coach. I help people who lack clarity, vision and purpose to remove their blocks, discover their intuition and achieve their goals. What is consuming all your energy? Visit www.TheIntuitionCoach.com for a FREE New Start Quiz.

Do you ever listen to what people say about you? Do you take other people’s opinions about you seriously?

This is my personal guideline for what people say about me:

If someone tells you that you are a horse, laugh it off – they are obviously having a bad day and it has nothing to do with you. If a second person tells you that you are a horse, look in the mirror – they may have a point. If a third person tells you that you are a horse, enter the Grand National, because they are telling the truth.

Our auras, what we say and how we behave reflect our inner state. People respond to the energy they pick up from us, and they act as mirrors for us. We need to be aware of what other people see in the mirror.

For example, a person feels inferior and unloved and expresses himself with verbal attacks on other people to prove at all costs that he is right. He is advised to change his approach and say “Have you considered this aspect?” rather than say “You are so stupid – I know better and you must listen to me”.

He does not hear the advice and continues with his behaviour. Then someone else says “Try saying: There are two sides to this. Here is one side and here is the other side. What do you think?” rather than “How can you talk such drivel? Let met tell you the truth, and listen carefully, because I am the master.”

However, the ego is still in the way, until one day when someone says “I cannot hear a word of what you are saying, because I am overwhelmed by how you are talking!”. Sadly, a really good message goes completely unnoticed, because the messenger gets in the way of the message. The result is a person who feels even lonelier and more unloved.

Sometimes we also hide a talent because of the same blind spot. For example, a person is always doodling and making little drawings. Somebody says “That is beautiful – why don’t you do it more often?” and the response is “No, this is nothing” and the drawings are hidden away.

Then a friend enters some of the drawings into a competition, and the unwilling artist wins – but runs away from the publicity and still says “it is nothing”.

Other friends notice this talent and ask for drawings. The artist feels comfortable with the requests, and slowly, slowly starts to trust the creative flow. He builds up confidence to the point where he not only responds to requests, but also experiments with new techniques. Then one day he realizes that he can trust his talent, and the resulting works of art are incredibly beautiful because they come from a sacred space.

You cannot reject the reflection in your mirror for ever.

Have you had a good laugh today?

If you are saying no, is it because you have not had a reason for laughing?

Do you need a reason to laugh? No, you don’t. Just start laughing from your belly and feel how your body and state of mind changes.

You do not need to tell any jokes to laugh, because you will eventually run out of jokes and you will encounter offensive jokes.

What happens when you laugh from your belly? You massage your diaphragm, thorax, abdomen, heart, lungs and liver. The laughter stimulates the production of the alertness hormones catecholamines, which in turn cause the release of endorphins in the brain. Endorphins provide a sense of relaxation and well-being and dull the perception of pain.

Just laugh for the sake of laughing and see what a difference it makes.

There are times when you are adamant about going in a particular direction. Then life steers you in another direction and you believe you have failed.

How do you deal with that?

Take a step back and look at the bigger picture. You could focus on your “failure” and make it worse, or you could see that experience as a necessary small step leading towards a big step and eventual success.

It is all about perception and going with the flow.