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“I feel like my life stopped when I married this man and now I want to move on. How do I do it?”
It is interesting how, in some relationships, we grow emotionally and spiritually as part of the relationship, while in other relationships our lives are placed on hold and we only experience pain as part of the relationship
Why is it that we make a decision to enter some relationships, while we intuitively know that we are doing the wrong thing? This could relate to both a love, work or friendship relationship. In the moment that we make the decision we know it is the wrong decision. However, we seem to go on auto pilot and stay on this destructive path.
Often the decision has other consequences, for example you know that you are married to the wrong person, you know that you need to end the relationship at the first opportunity, but nevertheless you continue and have a child with this person. You justify the situation in every way you can think of, and finally the pain of staying where you are becomes greater than moving on.
Only at that point do you gather the courage to take that step out of the relationship.
Then why did you enter the relationship in the first place? Because you had a soul contract with the other person. As part of your destiny you needed to honour the contract.
What is the nature and purpose of the soul contract?
That differs from one relationship to the next. In some instances the purpose is to deal with physical or emotional violence and find your own inner strength that you otherwise would not be aware of. In other instances the purpose would be to discover your power to control your own life, and to take the control from the person you married and get your own life on track again.
Or you could for example need to experience emotional coldness from your partner so that you can understand the importance of acknowledging and dealing with your own emotions.
Where children are involved, part of your soul contract is to raise and nurture the child, because that child chose you and your partner as their parents. The child also chose particular emotional and spiritual experiences as part of their life path, and you and your partner represent those experiences.
Either way, at some point that soul contract between you and your partner comes to a natural end. When that happens, you find the strength to walk away from the relationship.
Does this mean the end of the relationship? No. Yes, you do realise that you have placed a large part of your life on hold, and you suddenly have the energy and inclination to continue with activities that you had left behind at the beginning of the destructive relationship.
However, this is only the beginning of the resumed personal growth. You truly get back on track when you look back at the relationship and discover the wisdom that you were meant to discover in the process.
Look back at the blessings from the relationship, for example your children, knowing how wrong it is to marry for pity rather than love, understanding the importance of listening to your intuition, finding your own power and using that to build your ideal future for yourself.
When you are ready to leave the relationship, you will discover how help comes your way in many forms – from physical help in moving house to making new friends that help you feel comfortable being your new self, to support from your children who want to see you happy and intuitively have a better grasp on the situation that you often give then credit for.
The first step is to stop castigating yourself for making a “wrong” decision and look for the wisdom and the blessings. The rest will follow naturally.
Are you stuck in a marriage or a relationship that feels stifling? Are you hesitant to leave a relationship that stunts your growth?
I can help you.
Visit goo.gl/lbFkN for an intuitive assessment of your relationship.